A Flick of the Pen

Source: Wikimedia Commons

I read an article that said airplane coffee is basically made with toilet water. I was so disgusted I went a whole flight without drinking any coffee on a plane.

But then I figured, coffee is brown anyway. Once you add cream and sugar, you can’t tell it was brewed in a toilet.

I can’t be parted from my coffee. It’s not that I’m addicted to caffeine; I cherish the flavor, the aroma, the warmth of the cup in my hand.

I’m already 30,000 feet up in a tin can. How bad can it be to add bacteria to the dangers of whipping through the sky at 700 mph?

I’ve also read that tomato juice tastes best at this altitude. For some reason your taste buds function better. On this matter I would argue that it is actually the opposite, if you find tomato juice appetizing. But I inadvertently tested this theory by eating precisely one Thin Mint cookie. Blech! Like eating crunchy toothpaste, the mint flavor was so overpowering.

The most interesting phenomenon to me, though, is how movies impact me on a plane. With a comedy that would have been mildly funny on the ground, I’m lmao, which is what happened when I watched “Bridesmaids.” If a drama is sad, I’m weeping like I just lost a loved one. In “The Life of Pi,” when the tiger didn’t look back at the boy as it walked into the forest, I cried – audibly. Same with “Lion.” I was straight up boo-hooing through that entire movie, trying to sink down in my seat so no one could see me getting so emotional.

With everything being so different at 30,000 feet, I wish calories didn’t count. I have an insatiable appetite on flights. Each time the snack cart comes by I’m like a cat hearing a can opener. “Snacks? Snacks!” Given that emotions run hotter and flavors are magnified, I’m sure that calories count double.

If that is the case, I’m going to really savor this toilet coffee.